Rediscovering What Truly Matters this Christmas Amidst Consumerism and Perfectionism

The holiday season often arrives with a mix of excitement and pressure. For many of us, especially as women, Christmas can quickly shift from a joyful celebration to a source of overwhelm. The push to create the perfect holiday experience, fueled by consumerism and endless to-do lists, can leave us feeling drained and disconnected from what truly matters. This year, I want to share a gentle reminder about nurturing what’s important: family, rest, and healing.

Caption: A calm Christmas setting that invites rest and connection over consumerism.

The Pressure to Be Perfect and Its Toll

Every December, the message seems clear: Christmas should be magical, flawless, and filled with the best gifts. Advertisements and social media amplify this idea, encouraging us to buy more, decorate more, and do more. But this constant push can create a heavy burden.

Many women and mothers I know feel this pressure deeply. The desire to provide the perfect gifts, prepare the perfect meals, and host the perfect gatherings can lead to exhaustion. Instead of feeling joyful, we often feel overwhelmed, trying to meet expectations that don’t reflect our true needs or values.

Why does this happen?

Consumerism plays a big role. It tells us that happiness comes from things—more toys, more decorations, more experiences bought and sold. Perfectionism adds another layer, convincing us that if everything isn’t just right, we’ve somehow failed.

This combination can make Christmas feel less like a time for nurturing and more like a race to keep up.

What do we Lose in the Rush

When we focus on consumerism and perfection, we lose sight of the simple joys that make Christmas meaningful. The laughter around the dinner table, the quiet moments of rest, the warmth of family traditions—these are the true gifts.

In our rush, we often forget that children remember feelings more than things. They cherish the time spent together, the stories shared, and the sense of safety and love. When we prioritise buying over being, we miss opportunities for healing and connection.

Here’s what often gets lost:

• Rest: The chance to slow down and recharge.

• Healing: Time to mend relationships and soothe emotional wounds.

• Nurturing: Creating an environment where everyone feels valued and cared for.

  
  

How do we Shift Focus Back to What Matters

Changing the way we approach Christmas can feel challenging, but small steps can make a big difference. Here are some ideas that have helped me and others find more peace during the holidays:

1. Simplify Gift Giving

Instead of trying to buy everything, focus on meaningful gifts. Handmade presents, shared experiences, or even a heartfelt letter can carry more weight than expensive toys or gadgets. This reduces overwhelm and helps children appreciate the thought behind the gift.

2. Create Space for Rest

Plan downtime into your holiday schedule. This might mean saying no to some events or traditions that feel more stressful than joyful. Rest is essential for nurturing your own well-being and being fully present with your family.

3. Embrace Imperfection

Let go of the idea that everything must be perfect. A slightly messy house or a simple meal doesn’t diminish the love and care you put into the season. Children notice your calm and presence far more than the details.

4. Focus on Family Connection

Make time for activities that bring your family together without pressure. Reading holiday stories, baking cookies, or taking a walk to see lights can create lasting memories. These moments nurture bonds and provide healing space.

5. Practice Self-Compassion

Recognise that feeling overwhelmed is normal. Give yourself permission to ask for help, take breaks, and prioritise your own needs. When you nurture yourself, you’re better able to nurture others.

A Family’s Shift to Meaningful Christmas

A friend of mine shared how her family changed their holiday approach last year. Instead of buying many gifts, they agreed on one special present per person and spent the rest of the time volunteering at a local shelter. They also set aside evenings for storytelling and homemade treats.

The result? Less stress, more laughter, and a deeper sense of connection. Her children talked about the experience for months afterward, remembering the warmth and togetherness rather than the gifts.

So ask yourself. What is it that you want to feel this Christmas and how do you want to make others feel?

I know I struggle with this but every year I try to step in to what I truly love and want out of this holiday. I do love decorating and feel my own creative flare sparked so for me this isnt stressful but buying lots of presents is so I've decided to make chutney and for friends and only buy a few presents of ethical value for family. The rest of the time, I hope to enjoy good food that ive either enjoyed making or thats already ready to put in the oven so I can have more time laughing, dancing and playing games with friends and family OR some well needed rest time practising yin yoga :)

Ideas for more joy this season

• Write random acts of kindness on little bits of colourful paper and fold them up and pop them in a jar. each day of December, take one out and pay it forward. It may be things like buy a stranger a coffee, give a homeless person an old blanket you no longer need, pop a tin in the supermarket food bank collection.

• You could do the same with food and useful things. everyday put something in a box (you leave by the door) and by Christmas eve, give it to a food bank or charity.

• Every day of December pick something nurturing to do, like make chai lattes and mince pies for friends, walk around a christmas market or craft fair. Watch a Christmas film, have a girls night bring and share dinner.

• Make Christmas decorations-look online for ideas such as homemade crackers using newspaper and ribbon or wax stars for the windows.

• Offer to swop a head massage with a friend or family member.

• Treat yourself to 10 mins of restorative yoga everyday either 10 mins before you need to get up or 10 mins before bed.

• Walk in nature and notice the season beauty and how the animals respond, come home and wrap up with a hot choc, a good book or your fave magazine.